"Sediakan waktu yang cukup untuk merencanakan pernikahan anda setidaknya duabelas bulan
karena dengan waktu yang cukup anda akan dapat memperoleh lebih banyak pilihan dan memilih yang terbaik untuk pernikahan anda."
Dalam merencanakan dan menentukan tanggal pernikahan sebaiknya perlu untuk mempertimbangkan beberapa faktor yang cukup penting seperti:
Keadaan cuaca dan musim.
Menikah dimusim hujan akan lebih baik diadakan di dalam gedung.
Hari dimana para undangan akan bisa datang.
Para pengantin biasanya memilih hari pernikahan pada akhir pekan hal ini disebabkan karena lebih besarnya kemunkinan undangan untuk bisa datang tetapi tidak jarang juga pengantin mengadakan pesta pernikahan di awal atau pertengahan minggu. Hal yang terpenting adalah apabila semua keluarga tidak berkeberatan maka hal tersebut tidak akan menjadi masalah.
Mempertimbangkan hari raya lainnya yang akan bertepatan dengan hari pernikahan anda.
Apabila hari pernikahan anda bertepatan dengan hari libur nasional tentunya tempat hiburan lainnya akan padat jadi harus mempertimbangakan waktu dan tempatnya.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Wedding Chocolate Banana Cake Of Christophe Felder
Preparation:
30 minutes+ 3 hours with the refrigerator Cooking: 25 to 30 minutes Ingredients for 8 people:chocolate 100g with cocoa-110g 60% of butter-4 eggs-150g of sugar semolina-60g of flour-1 cuiullère to powder cocoa soup not sweetened-1 banana-50g of brown sugar.
Process:
Chop the chocolate then made melt it with the bain-marie or with the microwave with butter, mix until obtaining a smooth and tepid texture.Make bleach eggs with the caster sugar while whipping vigorously. Incorporate the chocolate melted with butter. Filter together the flour and the cocoa then add them to the paste.Reserve this mixture with refrigerator 2 to 3 a.m., even a night.
Preheat your furnace with 210°C.Butter and farinez a mould with lacked 24 cm in diameter then fill it with the apparatus chocolate.Approximately peel and cut bananas out of 4 mm thickness discs and cover surface with the cake.Make cook during 25 minutes by supervising the cooking and the colouring of the cake.Let cool out of the furnace, unmould the cake then powder it with brown sugar.
This cake is better if it is tasted tepid, accompanied of a hot chocolate cup it is a delight.
30 minutes+ 3 hours with the refrigerator Cooking: 25 to 30 minutes Ingredients for 8 people:chocolate 100g with cocoa-110g 60% of butter-4 eggs-150g of sugar semolina-60g of flour-1 cuiullère to powder cocoa soup not sweetened-1 banana-50g of brown sugar.
Process:
Chop the chocolate then made melt it with the bain-marie or with the microwave with butter, mix until obtaining a smooth and tepid texture.Make bleach eggs with the caster sugar while whipping vigorously. Incorporate the chocolate melted with butter. Filter together the flour and the cocoa then add them to the paste.Reserve this mixture with refrigerator 2 to 3 a.m., even a night.
Preheat your furnace with 210°C.Butter and farinez a mould with lacked 24 cm in diameter then fill it with the apparatus chocolate.Approximately peel and cut bananas out of 4 mm thickness discs and cover surface with the cake.Make cook during 25 minutes by supervising the cooking and the colouring of the cake.Let cool out of the furnace, unmould the cake then powder it with brown sugar.
This cake is better if it is tasted tepid, accompanied of a hot chocolate cup it is a delight.
INGREDIENTS:
8 Corn tortillas
16 ounces (1 cn)Corn black beans - rinsed and drained
7 ounces (1 cn)pink salmon; w bones - drained
2 tablespoons Safflower oil
1/4 cup Fresh lime juice
1/4 cup Fresh parsley - chopped
1/2 teaspoon Onion powder
1/2 teaspoon Celery salt
3/4 teaspoon Ground cumin
3/4 teaspoon Garlic - minced
1/2 teaspoon Lime zest - rated
1/4 teaspoon Red pepper flakes - dried
1/4 teaspoon Chili pepper
INSTRUCTION:
To prepare this appetizer Mexican recipe preheat oven to 350 degrees first. Then cut tortillas in triangles and toast oven until crisp, about 5 minutes. Combine the beans and salmon, flaking the salmon with a fork. Mix remaining ingredients; chill to blend flavors. Serve with tortilla chips.
8 Corn tortillas
16 ounces (1 cn)Corn black beans - rinsed and drained
7 ounces (1 cn)pink salmon; w bones - drained
2 tablespoons Safflower oil
1/4 cup Fresh lime juice
1/4 cup Fresh parsley - chopped
1/2 teaspoon Onion powder
1/2 teaspoon Celery salt
3/4 teaspoon Ground cumin
3/4 teaspoon Garlic - minced
1/2 teaspoon Lime zest - rated
1/4 teaspoon Red pepper flakes - dried
1/4 teaspoon Chili pepper
INSTRUCTION:
To prepare this appetizer Mexican recipe preheat oven to 350 degrees first. Then cut tortillas in triangles and toast oven until crisp, about 5 minutes. Combine the beans and salmon, flaking the salmon with a fork. Mix remaining ingredients; chill to blend flavors. Serve with tortilla chips.
Characteristics of the woman whom it is most befitting to marry
As we have previously mentioned, what is intended by nikaah is for the husband and wife to seek pleasure/enjoyment with each other and build a pious family leading to a stable community.
So, based upon this, the type of woman whom it is most befitting to marry is the one who exemplifies these two issues, and that she is both physically and spiritually/internally beautiful.
As regards physical beauty, this entails completeness of structure, the more beautiful and sweeter in speech a woman is, the more pleasing she is to the eyes, and likewise her speech is to the ears. So the heart opens up to her and feels comfortable in her presence, and in so doing, actualising the statement of Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala):
{And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy…} (Soorah ar-Room, Aayah 21)
Her spiritual/inner beauty, on the other hand entails completeness of religion and manners, and the more complete a woman is in her religion and manners the more beloved she is to the soul and the better are the consequences (of marrying her). Because, a religious woman obeys Allaah's commands and safeguards her duties towards her husband, his bed, his children and wealth; She assists him in obeying Allaah, when he forgets she reminds him and if he is lazy she encourages him, if he is angry she cools him down. And a well mannered lady does things to increase her husband's love, respects him and does not stay back in anything he likes her to go ahead with, nor does she go ahead in anything he likes her to stay back in. The Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) was asked: who is the best wife? And he answered:
«One who pleases him when he looks, obeys him when he commands, and does not go against his rules in her person and his wealth, in a manner he dislikes.» And he also said:
«Marry loving wives with high birth rates for I will be proud of your numbers in front of the (other) Prophets (or nations).» Thus, if a woman with both physical and spiritual/inner beauty can be obtained, then this is the height of perfection and the greatest happiness with the guidance of Allaah.
So, based upon this, the type of woman whom it is most befitting to marry is the one who exemplifies these two issues, and that she is both physically and spiritually/internally beautiful.
As regards physical beauty, this entails completeness of structure, the more beautiful and sweeter in speech a woman is, the more pleasing she is to the eyes, and likewise her speech is to the ears. So the heart opens up to her and feels comfortable in her presence, and in so doing, actualising the statement of Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala):
{And among His Signs is this, that He created for you wives from among yourselves, that you may find repose in them, and He has put between you affection and mercy…} (Soorah ar-Room, Aayah 21)
Her spiritual/inner beauty, on the other hand entails completeness of religion and manners, and the more complete a woman is in her religion and manners the more beloved she is to the soul and the better are the consequences (of marrying her). Because, a religious woman obeys Allaah's commands and safeguards her duties towards her husband, his bed, his children and wealth; She assists him in obeying Allaah, when he forgets she reminds him and if he is lazy she encourages him, if he is angry she cools him down. And a well mannered lady does things to increase her husband's love, respects him and does not stay back in anything he likes her to go ahead with, nor does she go ahead in anything he likes her to stay back in. The Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) was asked: who is the best wife? And he answered:
«One who pleases him when he looks, obeys him when he commands, and does not go against his rules in her person and his wealth, in a manner he dislikes.» And he also said:
«Marry loving wives with high birth rates for I will be proud of your numbers in front of the (other) Prophets (or nations).» Thus, if a woman with both physical and spiritual/inner beauty can be obtained, then this is the height of perfection and the greatest happiness with the guidance of Allaah.
The conditions for nikaah
Part of the beauty of the Islaamic system and the precision applied in legislating its rulings is that conditions exist for every contract which are applied,
and in so doing establishes limits/constraints within which they are carried out and sustained. So, every contract has conditions without which the contract is incomplete. And this is clearly indicative of the Islaamic rulings and its perfectness, since it came from One Who is All-Wise and knows all that is good for His creation. So He has legislated for them that by which their religious and worldly affairs are improved so that the situation does not become chaotic and without limits. One of these contracts is the contract of nikaah; and the contract of nikaah has conditions, and we shall mention the important ones here:
1) Consent of both parties: So it is incorrect to force either the man or the woman to marry each other, if they do not so desire. Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will…} (Soorah an-Nisaa., Aayah 19)
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«A virgin should not be married until her approval is sought», and they said: O Messenger of Allaah, what form will her agreement take? He said:
«That she remains silent.»
So the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) has prohibited the marriage of a woman who has not consented; and this includes the virgin and the divorcee or widower. However, in the case of the latter, her verbal consent is imperative, but for the virgin, silence is sufficient since it is possible that she may be shy in (verbally) indicating her consent.
If she is not interested in getting married, then it is not permissible for anyone to force her, even her father, as mentioned in the hadeeth:
«…and regarding the virgin, then her father is to seek her consent.»
And there is no sin upon her father if he does not marry her off in such a situation, because she herself is not interested. However, he must (continue to) maintain and protect her.
If two individuals were to seek her hand in marriage and she expresses a preference for one over the other, and her walee wants her to marry the other, then she is to be married off to the one she chooses if he is suitable for her. However, if he is not suitable for her, then her walee is to prevent her from marrying him, and as such there is no sin upon him.
2) The walee: The nikaah is not valid if the bride does not have a walee, as the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«There is no nikaah without a walee.»
So if a woman marries herself off, her nikaah is invalid.
The walee is a male adult who is an adult, responsible person among her closest male relatives (from her father's side), such as the father, or grandfather (father's father), the son, the grandson, (son's son), the blood brother, the father's brother, the father's uncle and their children.
As for the mother's brother, his children and the grandfather (mother's father), then they do not Islaamically have any guardianship over her.
Since it is imperative for her to have a walee, and it is obligatory upon the walee to choose the most suitable and the most ideal partner for her if there are a number to choose from. And if there is only one person who has sought her hand in marriage, and he is suitable and she is pleased with him, then her walee must marry her off to him.
Let's pause for a moment to understand the extent of this major responsibility which the walee undertakes on behalf of the woman Allaah has made him a guardian over. She is therefore a trust upon his shoulders and it is obligatory upon him to take care it and place it in its proper place. Also, it is forbidden for him to hoard her for his own personal goals, or marry her off with other than one who befits her, out of greed for that in which he may give to him. Certainly, this is part of the betrayal of trust and Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{O you who believe! Betray not Allaah and His Messenger, nor betray knowingly your Amânât (things entrusted to you)} (Soorah al-Anfaal, Aayah 27).
He also says:
{Verily! Allaah likes not any treacherous ingrate to Allaah} (Soorah al-Hajj 38).
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«Each one of you is a shepherd, and each one of you will be questioned about his flock.»
(Unfortunately) you find some suitable people who seek a woman's hand in marriage from her walee, and her walee simply continues to reject one after the other. So, whoever is found to be like this, then his guardianship over her becomes nullified and another walee from the closest of those who qualify (for the responsibility) should marry her off.
and in so doing establishes limits/constraints within which they are carried out and sustained. So, every contract has conditions without which the contract is incomplete. And this is clearly indicative of the Islaamic rulings and its perfectness, since it came from One Who is All-Wise and knows all that is good for His creation. So He has legislated for them that by which their religious and worldly affairs are improved so that the situation does not become chaotic and without limits. One of these contracts is the contract of nikaah; and the contract of nikaah has conditions, and we shall mention the important ones here:
1) Consent of both parties: So it is incorrect to force either the man or the woman to marry each other, if they do not so desire. Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{O you who believe! You are forbidden to inherit women against their will…} (Soorah an-Nisaa., Aayah 19)
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«A virgin should not be married until her approval is sought», and they said: O Messenger of Allaah, what form will her agreement take? He said:
«That she remains silent.»
So the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) has prohibited the marriage of a woman who has not consented; and this includes the virgin and the divorcee or widower. However, in the case of the latter, her verbal consent is imperative, but for the virgin, silence is sufficient since it is possible that she may be shy in (verbally) indicating her consent.
If she is not interested in getting married, then it is not permissible for anyone to force her, even her father, as mentioned in the hadeeth:
«…and regarding the virgin, then her father is to seek her consent.»
And there is no sin upon her father if he does not marry her off in such a situation, because she herself is not interested. However, he must (continue to) maintain and protect her.
If two individuals were to seek her hand in marriage and she expresses a preference for one over the other, and her walee wants her to marry the other, then she is to be married off to the one she chooses if he is suitable for her. However, if he is not suitable for her, then her walee is to prevent her from marrying him, and as such there is no sin upon him.
2) The walee: The nikaah is not valid if the bride does not have a walee, as the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«There is no nikaah without a walee.»
So if a woman marries herself off, her nikaah is invalid.
The walee is a male adult who is an adult, responsible person among her closest male relatives (from her father's side), such as the father, or grandfather (father's father), the son, the grandson, (son's son), the blood brother, the father's brother, the father's uncle and their children.
As for the mother's brother, his children and the grandfather (mother's father), then they do not Islaamically have any guardianship over her.
Since it is imperative for her to have a walee, and it is obligatory upon the walee to choose the most suitable and the most ideal partner for her if there are a number to choose from. And if there is only one person who has sought her hand in marriage, and he is suitable and she is pleased with him, then her walee must marry her off to him.
Let's pause for a moment to understand the extent of this major responsibility which the walee undertakes on behalf of the woman Allaah has made him a guardian over. She is therefore a trust upon his shoulders and it is obligatory upon him to take care it and place it in its proper place. Also, it is forbidden for him to hoard her for his own personal goals, or marry her off with other than one who befits her, out of greed for that in which he may give to him. Certainly, this is part of the betrayal of trust and Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{O you who believe! Betray not Allaah and His Messenger, nor betray knowingly your Amânât (things entrusted to you)} (Soorah al-Anfaal, Aayah 27).
He also says:
{Verily! Allaah likes not any treacherous ingrate to Allaah} (Soorah al-Hajj 38).
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«Each one of you is a shepherd, and each one of you will be questioned about his flock.»
(Unfortunately) you find some suitable people who seek a woman's hand in marriage from her walee, and her walee simply continues to reject one after the other. So, whoever is found to be like this, then his guardianship over her becomes nullified and another walee from the closest of those who qualify (for the responsibility) should marry her off.
The wisdom of nikaah
Nikaah in itself is legislated, and more so for the one who experiences desires and is capable (of getting married).
It is also from the Sunnah of the Messengers, as Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{And indeed We sent Messengers before you (O Muhammad ), and made for them wives and offspring. And it was not for a Messenger to bring a sign except by Allaah's Leave. (For) each and every matter there is a Decree (from Allaah).} (Soorah ar-Ra'd, Aayah 38)
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) also married, and he said:
«Indeed, I marry women. So, whoever goes against my Sunnah, then he is not from me.»
Because of this, the scholars have said: "marriage for one who experiences desires is better than voluntary acts of worship, since it entails much good", as shall be explained a little later on, inshaa.-Allaah.
But at certain instances, nikaah may become obligatory, such as in the case of a man who has strong desires and fears for himself that he may fall into that which is prohibited if he does not get married. In this case therefore, it is obligatory upon him to get married so as to prevent himself from falling into that which is prohibited.
The Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«O young men! Whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and protecting one's chastity. Whoever cannot do that, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.»
It is also from the Sunnah of the Messengers, as Allaah (Subhaanahu wa Ta'aala) says:
{And indeed We sent Messengers before you (O Muhammad ), and made for them wives and offspring. And it was not for a Messenger to bring a sign except by Allaah's Leave. (For) each and every matter there is a Decree (from Allaah).} (Soorah ar-Ra'd, Aayah 38)
And the Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) also married, and he said:
«Indeed, I marry women. So, whoever goes against my Sunnah, then he is not from me.»
Because of this, the scholars have said: "marriage for one who experiences desires is better than voluntary acts of worship, since it entails much good", as shall be explained a little later on, inshaa.-Allaah.
But at certain instances, nikaah may become obligatory, such as in the case of a man who has strong desires and fears for himself that he may fall into that which is prohibited if he does not get married. In this case therefore, it is obligatory upon him to get married so as to prevent himself from falling into that which is prohibited.
The Prophet (sal-Allaahu 'alayhe wa sallam) said:
«O young men! Whoever among you can afford to get married, let him do so, for it is more effective in lowering the gaze and protecting one's chastity. Whoever cannot do that, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.»
Definition of Nikah
Linguistically – It means "the contract of marriage", and it also means "having intercourse with the wife". Abu 'Alee al-Qaalee said: "The Arabs have differed with respect to the use of the word ((contract)) and ((intercourse)). So, if they say: So and so made nikaah with a girl or the daughter of so and so, then what they intend is the contract of marriage. And if they say: He made nikaah with this woman or his wife, then what they intend is sexual intercourse."
Technically – A contract of agreement between a man and a woman, each intending by it to seek pleasure/enjoyment with the other and building a pious family leading to a stable community.
It needs to be mentioned here, that the intention behind nikaah is not simply to seek pleasure/enjoyment with one's partner, rather, it is also intended to build a pious family leading to a stable community. However, it may well be that one of the two of these intentions takes precedence over the other according to the specific circumstances of a person.
Technically – A contract of agreement between a man and a woman, each intending by it to seek pleasure/enjoyment with the other and building a pious family leading to a stable community.
It needs to be mentioned here, that the intention behind nikaah is not simply to seek pleasure/enjoyment with one's partner, rather, it is also intended to build a pious family leading to a stable community. However, it may well be that one of the two of these intentions takes precedence over the other according to the specific circumstances of a person.
What to say at the time of making love
When a Muslim man is about to enter his wife, he should always say first:
Bismillaahi, Allaahumma jannibnaa ash-Shaytaan, wa jannib ash-Shaytaan maa razaqtanaa [In the name of Allaah, O Allaah, keep us away from the devil, and keep the devil away from that which You may grant us (ie. offspring).] About this, the Prophet said:
«After that, if Allaah decrees that they will have a child, the devil will never be able to harm that child.» [al-Bukhaaree]
Bismillaahi, Allaahumma jannibnaa ash-Shaytaan, wa jannib ash-Shaytaan maa razaqtanaa [In the name of Allaah, O Allaah, keep us away from the devil, and keep the devil away from that which You may grant us (ie. offspring).] About this, the Prophet said:
«After that, if Allaah decrees that they will have a child, the devil will never be able to harm that child.» [al-Bukhaaree]
The praying of husband and wife together
It is desirable for the husband and wife to pray 2 raka'aat together on their wedding night. This has been narrated from the earliest generation of Muslims, as in the following 2 narrations:
[a] First: On the authority of Abu Sa'eed Mawla Abu Asyad who said:
'I got married while I was a slave. I invited a number of the companions of the Prophet, among them was Ibn Mas'ood, Abu Dharr and Hudhayfah. When the prayer was called, Abu Dharr began to step forward when the others said to him: 'No!' He said: 'Is it so?' And they said: 'Yes.' Then, I stepped forward and led the prayer though I was a slave possessed. They taught me, saying: 'When your wife comes to you, pray 2 raka'aat. Then, ask Allaah for the good of that which has come to you, and seek refuge in Him from its evil. Then it is up to you and it is up to your wife.' [Ibn Abee Shaybah and 'Abdur-Razzaaq]
[b] Second: On the authority of Shaqeeq who said:
A man named Abu Hareez came and said: 'I have married a young girl, and I am afraid that she will despise me.' 'Abdullaah ibn Mas'ood said to him: "Verily, closeness is from Allaah, and hatred is from Shaytaan, who wishes to make despicable that which Allaah has allowed. So, when your wife comes to you, tell her to pray behind you 2 raka'aat.' In another version of the same story, "'Abdullaah went on to say: 'And say: 'O Allaah give Your blessings on me in my wife, and to her in me. O Allaah join us together as long as You join us in good, and split us apart if You send to us that which is better.'" [Ibn Abee Shaybah and at-Tabaraanee and 'Abdur-Razzaaq: Saheeh].
[a] First: On the authority of Abu Sa'eed Mawla Abu Asyad who said:
'I got married while I was a slave. I invited a number of the companions of the Prophet, among them was Ibn Mas'ood, Abu Dharr and Hudhayfah. When the prayer was called, Abu Dharr began to step forward when the others said to him: 'No!' He said: 'Is it so?' And they said: 'Yes.' Then, I stepped forward and led the prayer though I was a slave possessed. They taught me, saying: 'When your wife comes to you, pray 2 raka'aat. Then, ask Allaah for the good of that which has come to you, and seek refuge in Him from its evil. Then it is up to you and it is up to your wife.' [Ibn Abee Shaybah and 'Abdur-Razzaaq]
[b] Second: On the authority of Shaqeeq who said:
A man named Abu Hareez came and said: 'I have married a young girl, and I am afraid that she will despise me.' 'Abdullaah ibn Mas'ood said to him: "Verily, closeness is from Allaah, and hatred is from Shaytaan, who wishes to make despicable that which Allaah has allowed. So, when your wife comes to you, tell her to pray behind you 2 raka'aat.' In another version of the same story, "'Abdullaah went on to say: 'And say: 'O Allaah give Your blessings on me in my wife, and to her in me. O Allaah join us together as long as You join us in good, and split us apart if You send to us that which is better.'" [Ibn Abee Shaybah and at-Tabaraanee and 'Abdur-Razzaaq: Saheeh].
Placing your hands on your wife's head and praying for her
The husband should, at the time of consummating the marriage with his wife or before that, place his hand on the front part of her head, mention the name of Allaah Most High, and pray for Allaah's blessings. As in the statement of the Prophet:
«When any of you marries a woman ...he should hold her forelock, mention Allaah Most High, and pray for His blessings saying: "O Allaah, I ask You for the good in her and the good with which You have created her, and I seek refuge in You from the evil in her and the evil with which You have created her.» (Allaahumma innee as.aluka min khayrihaa wa khayri maa jabaltahaa 'alayhi wa aa'oodhubika min sharrihaa wa sharri maa jabaltahaa 'alayhi) [Abu Daawood and others. al-Bukhaaree in "Af'aalul-'Ibaad", Abu Daawood, Ibn Maajah, al-Haakim, al-Bayhaqee and Abu Ya'laa with hasan isnaad...]
«When any of you marries a woman ...he should hold her forelock, mention Allaah Most High, and pray for His blessings saying: "O Allaah, I ask You for the good in her and the good with which You have created her, and I seek refuge in You from the evil in her and the evil with which You have created her.» (Allaahumma innee as.aluka min khayrihaa wa khayri maa jabaltahaa 'alayhi wa aa'oodhubika min sharrihaa wa sharri maa jabaltahaa 'alayhi) [Abu Daawood and others. al-Bukhaaree in "Af'aalul-'Ibaad", Abu Daawood, Ibn Maajah, al-Haakim, al-Bayhaqee and Abu Ya'laa with hasan isnaad...]
Kindness toward your wife when you wish to enter into her
It is desirable, when one goes into his wife on his wedding night, to show her kindness, such as presenting her with something to drink, etc. This is found in the hadeeth narrated by Asmaa bint Yazeed Ibn as-Sakan who said:
"I beautified 'Aa.ishah for Allaah's Messenger, then called him to come to see her unveiled. He came, sat next to her, and brought a large cup of milk from which he drank. Then, he offered it to 'Aa.ishah, but she lowered her head and felt shy. I scolded her and said to her: "Take from the hand of the Prophet." She then took it and drank some. Then, the Prophet said to her:
«Give some to your companion.» At that point, I said: "O Messenger of Allaah, rather take it yourself and drink, and then give it to me from your hand." He took it, drank some, and then offered it to me. I sat down and put it on my kness. Then, I began rotating it and following it with my lips in order that I might hit the spot from which the Prophet had drunk. Then, the Prophet said about some women who were there with me:
«Give them some.» But, they said: "We don't want it." (ie. we are not hungry). The Prophet said:
«Do not combine hunger and fibbing!» [Ahmad and al-Humaydee. Ahmad reports it with 2 isnaads - one of which
"I beautified 'Aa.ishah for Allaah's Messenger, then called him to come to see her unveiled. He came, sat next to her, and brought a large cup of milk from which he drank. Then, he offered it to 'Aa.ishah, but she lowered her head and felt shy. I scolded her and said to her: "Take from the hand of the Prophet." She then took it and drank some. Then, the Prophet said to her:
«Give some to your companion.» At that point, I said: "O Messenger of Allaah, rather take it yourself and drink, and then give it to me from your hand." He took it, drank some, and then offered it to me. I sat down and put it on my kness. Then, I began rotating it and following it with my lips in order that I might hit the spot from which the Prophet had drunk. Then, the Prophet said about some women who were there with me:
«Give them some.» But, they said: "We don't want it." (ie. we are not hungry). The Prophet said:
«Do not combine hunger and fibbing!» [Ahmad and al-Humaydee. Ahmad reports it with 2 isnaads - one of which
6 tips to cut wedding cost
Weddings are very nice occasions people want to attend to. But they can be time consuming and demand enormous attention on the part of the couple with lots of things to prepare for, in order for their wedding to be memorable. They can be very expensive, too. So how can you prepare for your wedding if you wan to save and are on a budget? Here are some tips.
1.Invitations. If you think that inviting people by giving them cards with fancy designs and made of expensive ink is still important to you, you may consider discarding that idea. You’re on a budget, right? Your main goal is to cut costs on things not that important to you. Besides, the people you’re inviting might just throw them away after reading it or when the wedding is over, so why bother? It could just waste your time and money. If you still insist on giving them invitations, then do it on a budget. You may go for DIY wedding cards instead. Or buy an inexpensive ink and cheap but lovely papers. You may also just send them an ecard, especially to people living out of the country. Or better yet, if you’re not thinking about formality, just call them.
2.Guests. The number of guests shouldn’t be too large if you want to cut wedding costs. Invite only your closest friends and family members. You’ll save on the food, too.
3.Photographer. No matter what the cost is, you’ll be able to find a professional wedding photographer. If you want your memories to last forever, then hire a professional who has the equipment and knows his craft. It’s a more preferable choice to a mere hobbyist who just might make mistakes. Remember, you’re paying for a service and you don’t want to risk on it.
4.Cake. If you’re no the type who values the look of your wedding cake a lot, then don’t go for a tall, grand look that costs a lot. Have a small cakeshop do the job instead.
5.Musicians. Don’t go for a band if you can’t afford it. Hire a very talented small-time singer instead. Give her the piece or the songs she will sing in advance and make sure she’ll be able to carry them out really well.
6.Prioritize, prioritize, prioritize. There are things that you want in your wedding that may not be within your budget. List those that are important to you in one group, then list those that are not in another. Learn to give value to those you believe will make your wedding memorable and discard the ones that are just frill to you, or go for a budget-friendly alternative. The key is to adjust with the budget you have.
A wedding is an important occasion to people who will spend their lives together, and it must be something that should be taken much time and preparation. Remember to save in advance if you want to have that special day a success to you bothScience Articles, and to people who will attend it.
1.Invitations. If you think that inviting people by giving them cards with fancy designs and made of expensive ink is still important to you, you may consider discarding that idea. You’re on a budget, right? Your main goal is to cut costs on things not that important to you. Besides, the people you’re inviting might just throw them away after reading it or when the wedding is over, so why bother? It could just waste your time and money. If you still insist on giving them invitations, then do it on a budget. You may go for DIY wedding cards instead. Or buy an inexpensive ink and cheap but lovely papers. You may also just send them an ecard, especially to people living out of the country. Or better yet, if you’re not thinking about formality, just call them.
2.Guests. The number of guests shouldn’t be too large if you want to cut wedding costs. Invite only your closest friends and family members. You’ll save on the food, too.
3.Photographer. No matter what the cost is, you’ll be able to find a professional wedding photographer. If you want your memories to last forever, then hire a professional who has the equipment and knows his craft. It’s a more preferable choice to a mere hobbyist who just might make mistakes. Remember, you’re paying for a service and you don’t want to risk on it.
4.Cake. If you’re no the type who values the look of your wedding cake a lot, then don’t go for a tall, grand look that costs a lot. Have a small cakeshop do the job instead.
5.Musicians. Don’t go for a band if you can’t afford it. Hire a very talented small-time singer instead. Give her the piece or the songs she will sing in advance and make sure she’ll be able to carry them out really well.
6.Prioritize, prioritize, prioritize. There are things that you want in your wedding that may not be within your budget. List those that are important to you in one group, then list those that are not in another. Learn to give value to those you believe will make your wedding memorable and discard the ones that are just frill to you, or go for a budget-friendly alternative. The key is to adjust with the budget you have.
A wedding is an important occasion to people who will spend their lives together, and it must be something that should be taken much time and preparation. Remember to save in advance if you want to have that special day a success to you bothScience Articles, and to people who will attend it.
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